Sunday, January 31, 2010

Learning Curve

Finally got stuck into my coursework and I'm enjoying it. It said that it takes 14 to 16 hours to do each unit, something must be wrong cause I've done the first one in 4 hours! Maybe I haven't learnt it correctly, oh well find out in a couple of weeks at the tutorial. Having a little break to write this and to sort my head out from last night's drinking! A good session and a good night. It was good to get out and unwind and I really enjoyed it though I doubt I'll be doing it again very soon!

This week I intend to start getting fit for the first time in years, my bike is here, new football trainers as well so no excuse not to get out and get fit. It's like the new year is actually beginning tomorrow, a month late, for me and it's with a new found excitement that I approach it with. Getting the driving urge again so will hope to start that up again very soon. Trying not to set myself a target like last time but I have one in my head, just this time will keep it to myself. T.L.M.S

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Calming air

After the emotional rants I've been having recently, an air of calmness have taken over me today. Perhaps it's the fact I've realised I can't control what other people do or maybe it's my recent dive into alcoholism! Over the past week I have found out the truth about some people and the true motives of others and now i'm aware of it all I can react accordingly. True I have noticed that my stress levels have risen somewhat and that basically at times I feel on the verge of full blown depression, not good signs at all. Do I go see the doctor and get put on the happy pills? I don't think that is the route I want to go down so another outlet is needed. A friend asked last night if I fancied playing football. I haven't kicked a ball in years but it could be exactly what I need. First off quit smoking, then improve fitness. They do say exercise is good for stress don't they?!

The mighty Baggies have progressed into the 5th round of the cup with a good win over Newcastle. I'm hoping we get Wolves at home! Plus Monday night we played very well and was unlucky not to have got a win. If I had the money I'd start going to the away games again, give me something to look forward to. Well for now it's time to cook my dinner and get stuck into my coursework, can't delay it any longer! T.L.M.S

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Happiness

How much does happiness cost? I probably couldn't afford it anyway, but it would be nice to buy some! Seems I've been lacking some for a long time and it's about time I'm due some. Everytime in the past year I've seen the light at the end of the tunnel it closes back on me. Not that I'm depressed(although I think I'm one step away from the happy pills!) just down-heartened. Take work today, in fact the past week. One bloke has it in for me and as he's the gaffer's brother his word is gospel. Omits the fact he's lazy and work shy to him though. I've had to endure two rollockings for things I hadn't done. Regardless how much I stood up for myself it went in one ear and out the other. Tomorrow is going to be fun.

Relationships haven't been the strongest point in my life either but hey, you live and learn from each one, no matter how long or short they might be. At times I think I'm better off alone then other times miss the company and closeness you get. No wonder I never sleep with the crap floating around my head! Add in the worries about work and debt I'm total wreck at times, other days I just let it all slip by. The best release I get is going to the Albion. Not Friday night, utter rubbish. That was enough to ruin your month least your weekend! Rant over T.L.M.S

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Same old, same old

My suspicions were right and to my disappointment it's finished before it really began. In my heart I already knew before it was said and that does make it easier. Still gutted though as I felt something I haven't for a long time. Can honestly say the past two weeks have been some of my happiest so will always remember that. Who's to say things might not start again.
So from here I move back on to work tomorrow. My aims for the year haven't changed and my determination has grown stronger to achieve them. Degree begins soon, will start driving lessons again very soon and the debt will be hit head on. I said this will be my year and it will be one way or the other. T.L.M.S

Friday, January 1, 2010

Happy new year

So the festivities are over and the year long work will begin again. To be honest this Christmas hasn't been as bad as I expected. My son has had a great time as his birthday is only a few days after Christmas so he's had a load of presents. Only downside is that he has to wait all year for two days close together! Myself it's been good. Met someone just before the holiday and it's going quite well I think. Well things have slowed down a bit the last few days which I did expect. Could be just me though as I tend to allow things dwell on my mind and go over so many situations I'm even more confused than when I started! Anyway I do hope it's just me as I like her a lot.
Last night was a messy night in a good way. Went out, got lashed and only spent £17! That can't be bad on any night let alone new years eve. Spent it with all my friends and really enjoyed myself, doesn't happen too often so it's good when it does.
Degree begins in 30 days and I'm looking forward to that as well. Gives me something to aim for and will wake my mind up from the slumber it's been in. Still got the driving to do and that is also at the top of the list. Got my debt to sort out as well and I will do that. 2010 will be my year I am certain of that as 2009 was one of the worst I have ever had and I will not allow that to happen again. T.L.M.S